I don’t ever have to explain myself to anyone. If you aren’t my mother, father, best friend or my girlfriend, I owe you no type of explanation whatsoever.
Gender roles. Who the fuck decided that because you’re a man, you have to be the more dominate one? Who the fuck said that just because you wear baggier clothes and you have a slightly more aggressive attitude that you have to “act like a man” in a lesbian relationship. I hate society and their “social norms”. I despise people who ask, “who’s the guy in the relationship”, and I loath anyone who doesn’t treat me like I’m a fucking girl! I am a women. I still need to feel comforted, I still enjoy having my neck kissed, I enjoy being called beautiful, I still need bedroom loving! I am NOT a man! I need just as much love and affection as any other female. If I make someone feel like a queen and I give them the world, shit, it would be nice to get a taste of what it feels like to be treated like a queen for once in my life back. Just because I have aggressive tendencies doesn’t mean I’m not soft sometimes. At the end of the day, I still need to be held. To be loved. To be touched. To be treated like a female why? Because bitch I am still a fucking woman!
I am so in Love with the idea of Love it’s ridiculous. I love seeing cute couples in love feeding off of each others souls and giving off blissful intoxicating vibes. They give me hope for my future. They make me look forward to the moment when I give my heart completely over to my soul mate. My definition of Love is different than the norm. The thought is so enchanting.
Get some strawberry ice cream or your favorite ice cream, let it defrost, pour 3-4 shots of vodka into the ice cream box, stir it, freeze it back up, and later, enjoy your ice cream shots! BAM!
I love being alone, I love sitting in my room for a few hours at night on the computer with nothing but music, a beer and my computer and I enjoy entertaining myself. But there comes a time when I get lonely. I get so lonely and crave nothing but the warmth of someone else. I want to be in love. I want love to fill my heart and take away the loniness that lies within. I want to be able to be vulnerable with someone other than myself. The only problem is, no matter how much I crave this impossible fairytale, I tend to keep my wall up. I want someone to force me to open up. I need that push and security from someone else. I try so hard to be an open book, but it’s hard to let people in when you’ve been hurt so many times before. Once I gain someone’s trust, when I can tell they are hurt or need a friend, I’m always there. I force them in a psychological, genuine friendly way to open up. I dig deep within there walls until what’s on their mind is completely out. I love knowing that I’ve helped others feel better about something, and I love being there “safe” place to run to when needed. I’ve never even had a friend or best friend that would do that for me. Everyone needs at least one person in their life who will go deep with you when they know you need it even though they know you don’t easily like throwing all of your emotions or problems on them. Maybe oneday I’ll find my “safe” place within someone. Until then, I’ll just continue to blog and only wish lol -_-